No one else is saying it

I really hate parenting.

Why am I the only person I've ever heard say this?? Granted, my circle is pretty small, but I get around on the internet and social media. So how have I never heard anyone else declare "I hate parenting!"?

Well... I hate parenting. I love my children, I do. I love them fiercely! But the role of molding and shaping their independent wills? I despise that responsibility. And I really hate that most of the days of my life as a parent, I have felt like a failure. I'm not being extreme or dramatic here. I legit feel like a failure.

But it isn't because my children are bad kids.
It is because of my perfectionistic nature.

I've learned more about myself through the parenting process than I have with any other endeavor in my life. I always knew I was detail oriented. But I didn't realize just how much this perfectionism fed my self-esteem and feelings of success until I started failing as a parent. To add insult to injury, I am also an idealist who becomes deeply discouraged when things don't go...  well...  ideally.

And here's another crappy thing... You don't get to jump ship when you realize you're not naturally gifted at parenting. Growing up, when I realized I didn't have the skills necessary to successfully continue in certain areas (performing on stage, for example), it was not a huge deal. Maybe I was bummed for a few days, but I was able to close that chapter and--for lack of a better word--quit. I could move forward believing I would find a new field in which my talents could prosper.

But there's no quitting in parenting.

So... I hate parenting. Parenting sucks. And it really sucks if you're a perfectionist like me. I'm here to tell you about it.